Expectations

I really wanted to write about our flawed human expectations that we receive and put on people, and this little juncture at Starbucks gave me the perfect intuition as to what I wanted to write…

So, I am sitting here in a Starbucks thinking about my day as well as observing the people around me (I admit, I am a frequent people watcher). Just a little while ago, a middle aged woman got her coffee and realized it was not what she ordered. As soon as the realization hit her, she immediately stormed back up from her table and hollered at the barista about their mistake. All the baristas were busy at the time and just gave her a look of acknowledgment that they see her waiting. Now the next thing she did really surprised me. She went behind the counter, dumped her drink down the sink, and with great frustration, put her empty cup in front of one of the girls. She then very rudely asked to make the “simple” drink that she ordered because she didn’t have time to wait. Well, guess what, the lady actually got what she wanted/demanded and they made her the drink as quick as they could.

I was very impressed how the three girls (baristas) handled the situation and I could have seen that situation go the other way and get even worse. But I guess the customer is always right and should always get what they want, right? My job demands the same amount of service to the customer as well, but I just can’t believe how people act many times about their expectations and what they always should get out of life. In this case, this woman expected, and I guess egotistically thought, she was above all the other customers and she “deserved” to be compensated first.

But here’s the thing, I realized everyone really is guilty of expecting things out of people and circumstances that we have absolutely no right to do. This woman had high expectations of how she was supposed to be served, and when they didn’t get met, she blew up (Figuratively, but if she keeps on acting like that, who knows what might happen down the road…) But in all seriousness, we all falsely put expectations over people and we hold them to our standards. I know I do this from time to time, and in the end, it gets me in a lot trouble.

I think that the relationships in people’s lives, and in my life, really have taken a few knockbacks because of the burdens that people (and I) have wrongly placed on others. Because we all fall short from God, our expectations of people in our lives will, too. And it will disappoint us and make our hearts bitter if we expect people to satisfy and fulfill our needs by those standards.

I think Christians struggle with expectations even more. And here’s why… Many Christians feel that they simply can’t live up to expectations of the pretentious, and many times hypocritical people that they want to do right by. Fact: people judge others wrongly all the time and Christians feel like they need to do things to achieve and win over those judgments. I know I have felt that way in the past. Early on in my Christian life I bottled everything up and acted like everything was perfect in my life because I didn’t want anyone to know or see my struggles or sins that I was going through. I just didn’t want anyone to think that I was a horrible person. Well, things have really changed because of the relationship I have with God and how He sets me free from those expectations.

And then there are Non-Christians who have never came to Christ because they feel like they can’t take the next step to know God because of their past and the expectation that they have to be “perfect” all the time.

Here’s the Truth with a capital T: If we rightly place our hopes and expectations in the hands of the Creator of the universe, there is no one left to blame when they are left unmet. And by doing this, we hold no person responsible for satisfying our needs. We evade anger, resentment, dislike, and our relationships are protected. God is waiting to hear our every concern, our every worry, and our deepest needs. For Christians who feel like they are held back by others, I hope that they can realize that those expectations are unrealistic and just plain wrong. Every Christian sins and makes mistakes daily, and can never live the “perfect life”.

I want to always let others know that they can always come to God and know that they will always be forgiven by His grace. Otherwise, if they do not, they will drown in expectations and drown others. And for the Non-Christians that feel like they are never enough, I want to always let these people know that they should always come just as they are to God, and God will never expect anyone to be perfect. Perfection can only happen when we come to him, with all of our dirty baggage, and be made new though His grace and love.

So, in summary, I encourage anyone I meet or reads this to share in struggles of life, come to God with forgiveness and repentance, live in a way that glorifies and honors God, and not hold others to our standards or be held captive by the expectations of other’s.

“For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope (expectation) is from Him”.
Psalm 62:5

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests and expectations be made known to God”
Philippians 4:6